I have to give kudos again to Code Black for bringing up the important issue of mental health and therapy. The following exchange is from the Season 1 finale “Blood Sport”:
Angus: I killed someone, and now I can’t walk in here without thinking about it. The pills let me not think about it.
Mike: I made a mistake when I told you not to talk to anyone about this. I pressured you, and it made you think you could go around this problem. But you can’t go around it. You can only go through it.
Angus: How do I do that?
Mike: Well, for starters, we find someone you can talk to. Would you let me help you with that?
For the record, I have never killed anyone, but I can relate to what Angus says. I don’t abuse substances, but the eating disorder does the same thing – it allows me to numb out to things I don’t want to think about. No one ever directly told me not to talk to anyone about things, but for years I acted the way Angus has been acting – trying to go around the problem. I figured that if I just flew under the radar, that things would be ok. For many years, that strategy “worked” in that I stayed out of treatment, finished college, had a great internship, and started medical school. However, the eating disorder was always there, and eventually it caught up to me.
I have learned the hard way that what Mike says is true – you can only go through it. It really stinks, and there are many days where I feel like the “solution” is to quit treatment and go back to flying under the radar. But, when I am in a better place, I know that I can’t really live like that. I have to go through it.
Furthermore, I love what Mike says about talking to someone. I wish there was a pill that could fix the eating disorder, just as Angus wanted a pill to fix his mental health problems. But, therapy really is the way to go, and as hard as it is to talk about this kind of stuff, that’s what needs to happen.
Finally, the way Mike asks Angus “would you let me help you with that?” is just perfect. I think too often friends and family try to be the solution, rather than helping their loved one get help. Mike doesn’t judge Angus for using the pills, and he doesn’t try to fix him. He simply offers to be there and help him get professional help. Absolutely perfect.
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